Everything froze, including the large wall clock that tick-tucked loudly in the sitting room. All eyes were fixed on me, and I just stood there stricken cold. I shut my mouth, gluing my lips together, but it was too late, the deed had been done. Right before me was the young man whom the arrow I had fired had hit, he just stood there wounded, bruised by the words of my outburst. I had done it this time and I knew it, everyone else staring also knew it.
The house had been bubbling with joy as our family gathered together to celebrate Christmas, then a fierce argument broke out. Being the ‘know it all’ that I was, I took charge until this young man who was my cousin hopped in, then I said it...i said the words ‘you of all people should shut up’. Everything froze...everythng including the large wall clock that tick-tucked loudly in the sitting room. All eyes were fixed on me, and I just stood there stricken cold. Those simple words had spelt it all, they had spelt more than I had said, they conveyed a meaning far deeper than they sounded. They conveyed my inner thought, my emotions and possibly my heart. To the hearer it conveyed his fears, his guilt and an inner conflict.
From that day forth, I realised that the most highly skilled assassins of relationships were not parents, friends or money, but words.
Words, I had gotten acquainted to them at an early age. Momma told me that I learnt how to speak earlier than most kids did. I talked about everything and everyone I saw or did not see. Later on, I got to understand the healing power of words especially on the day I gave my life to my lover Jesus Christ. How I had been healed of chronic depression that negative words had caused .
Words are healers, they can mend a broken heart and repair a life that has been shattered with low self esteem. Words can uplift and encourage you to dare the impossible. It is amazing how little words like ‘please’ and ‘thanks’ c an go a long way in transforming impressions. ‘am sorry’ can cool even the fiercest of all quarrel s,yet it has its limitations.
Words are killers. Masters in the art of seduction and betrayal and they can be anything they want to be if you only believe it. Ask the pregnant teenager who got deceived the day she chose to believe the flirting youth corper’s ‘I will marry you’, or ask the partially innocent prisoner about the words ‘it will make you rich’. And the depressed youth? It was the words his mother had sown when she reminded him that he could never amount to anything and now he knew he could never truly amount to anything just because he chose to believe.
But did the speakers really mean it? Did I really mean it? I didn’t but then again maybe I did.i read manipulative psychology books for a while and I had learnt to study a person from his body coordination, facial languages and most clearly words. I had succeeded in getting hidden motives behind text messages and spoken words, but it didn’t last long. I started losing friends cos I had overdone it. They were not experts in editing words so it sometimes spilled faster than they could contain (hey!no one is perfect) and I would react, ignoring their innocent intensions.
Maybe it wasn’t intentional but most times when we speak our emotions rub off on our words and we express them just the way they are. Emotions fluctuate so being pissed does not mean I hate the person but if I speak at that moment I might speak words that express to the hearer that I hate her. A lustful lover may not realise when the words ‘I love you’ spills out and deceives the hearer. And I believe you cannot truly love someone and not express it no matter how you try to resist it.
A hearer might hear what he fears the most, don’t blame him, he’s just being watchful. So the solution?, don’t always let your emotions speak. I am a learner so I sometimes make mistakes of speaking alongside my emotions. That’s why I prefer writing, I get to edit my words over and over again, although writing isn’t a sure way especially when this deadly clouds of emotion blurs one’s mind.
Never the less, life and death lies in the tongue, so be sure to listen to your words before they spill cos truly they can kill.
cathy,
The house had been bubbling with joy as our family gathered together to celebrate Christmas, then a fierce argument broke out. Being the ‘know it all’ that I was, I took charge until this young man who was my cousin hopped in, then I said it...i said the words ‘you of all people should shut up’. Everything froze...everythng including the large wall clock that tick-tucked loudly in the sitting room. All eyes were fixed on me, and I just stood there stricken cold. Those simple words had spelt it all, they had spelt more than I had said, they conveyed a meaning far deeper than they sounded. They conveyed my inner thought, my emotions and possibly my heart. To the hearer it conveyed his fears, his guilt and an inner conflict.
From that day forth, I realised that the most highly skilled assassins of relationships were not parents, friends or money, but words.
Words, I had gotten acquainted to them at an early age. Momma told me that I learnt how to speak earlier than most kids did. I talked about everything and everyone I saw or did not see. Later on, I got to understand the healing power of words especially on the day I gave my life to my lover Jesus Christ. How I had been healed of chronic depression that negative words had caused .
Words are healers, they can mend a broken heart and repair a life that has been shattered with low self esteem. Words can uplift and encourage you to dare the impossible. It is amazing how little words like ‘please’ and ‘thanks’ c an go a long way in transforming impressions. ‘am sorry’ can cool even the fiercest of all quarrel s,yet it has its limitations.
Words are killers. Masters in the art of seduction and betrayal and they can be anything they want to be if you only believe it. Ask the pregnant teenager who got deceived the day she chose to believe the flirting youth corper’s ‘I will marry you’, or ask the partially innocent prisoner about the words ‘it will make you rich’. And the depressed youth? It was the words his mother had sown when she reminded him that he could never amount to anything and now he knew he could never truly amount to anything just because he chose to believe.
But did the speakers really mean it? Did I really mean it? I didn’t but then again maybe I did.i read manipulative psychology books for a while and I had learnt to study a person from his body coordination, facial languages and most clearly words. I had succeeded in getting hidden motives behind text messages and spoken words, but it didn’t last long. I started losing friends cos I had overdone it. They were not experts in editing words so it sometimes spilled faster than they could contain (hey!no one is perfect) and I would react, ignoring their innocent intensions.
Maybe it wasn’t intentional but most times when we speak our emotions rub off on our words and we express them just the way they are. Emotions fluctuate so being pissed does not mean I hate the person but if I speak at that moment I might speak words that express to the hearer that I hate her. A lustful lover may not realise when the words ‘I love you’ spills out and deceives the hearer. And I believe you cannot truly love someone and not express it no matter how you try to resist it.
A hearer might hear what he fears the most, don’t blame him, he’s just being watchful. So the solution?, don’t always let your emotions speak. I am a learner so I sometimes make mistakes of speaking alongside my emotions. That’s why I prefer writing, I get to edit my words over and over again, although writing isn’t a sure way especially when this deadly clouds of emotion blurs one’s mind.
Never the less, life and death lies in the tongue, so be sure to listen to your words before they spill cos truly they can kill.
cathy,
Thanks for sharing...no one would really understand what you went through. But God understands,you are not alone he is and will always be with you...
ReplyDelete